Monday, April 4, 2011

Qrusade/Newnan.4-2-11.Scent of a Woman

The Lactic Report,  4.02.11  “Scent of a Woman”

SANDBAGS V.  

“Outta order?  I'll show you outta order! You don't know what outta order is!  Outta order.  Who do you think you're talkin' to? I've been around, you know?”
LTC Frank Slade

Okay, the box score … 

Starting Line up:
J-Delta (5)
Buck (5)
KX (4)
Doc (4)
Michigan (3)
Smoke (3)
Cornbread (2)
Stick (2)
NOLA (1)
Buckeroo (1)

Marginal.   Ahh, the rigors of youth.   One-Lap, dragging from another six weeks of academia and chlorine, headed south (with chaperones) for a few days in the Redneck Riviera (Destin actually, not PCB – hey, it’s way classier).  Make no mistake, Yours Truly (J-Delta) and Doc triangulated the Magellan, Galileo and Coriolis satellites to track your every move in high def streaming video.  Smile for the camera.

No Wheels.  A two car study of metallurgy earlier this week left ROTC unscathed; the same can not be said for the XTERRA.   Because I’m a softie for guys in a slump, I’m not dropping you into the next category (yet), but git ‘yer butt back out here.

One & Done(s).  The Big German, Aggie, Crank.  <crickets>  


The Workout

Ring o’ Fire:  Ok, so nothing about this morning’s layout resembled a ring or circle.  Truth be told, KX and I opted for the ‘low maintenance” set up last night.  But ‘Ring o’ Fire’ is a catchy name and we’re keeping it, so if you’re hung up on some geometric inconsistency of our layout, may I suggest 20 Timber Lunges to soften your demeanor. Although linear in nature, we managed to honor the spherical roots of the Ring by employing Archimedes’ Method of Exhaustion (ahem… at least OUR version of it).  By all accounts it lived up to the name.

The Dirty Details:  After the warm up, a 40 minute series of never ending wind sprints with a buffet of torture on each end of the field.  Thrusters, Timber Press, Burpees, Sandbag squats, Carolina Lockdowns, Push-ups, Timber Lunges, Plank, Pull-ups, Flutters, Bode Millers, (I’m forgetting a few).   We dispatched two-man teams on each iteration to pull the tires and waited (impatiently) in Plank until they rejoined the group. As promised, it hurt worse than a bloody blister.

Random grains of sand ….

Genetic Drift
[Cornbread:  ‘I love ya like collard greens and cornbread’].  Seriously brother, …? Fantasia lyrics on a Saturday morning?  And this from a guy who catches catfish on a cane pole and uses soap for bait?  You just moved to the top of the prayer list.

Groupthink
[J-Delta:  Ok KX, this next one’s all yours.  Call it’]
[KX:  ‘How bout some Timber Lunges … all the way to the sod patch and back’]
[J-Delta: ‘I’m with you brother, let’s go’]
Funny how some ideas sound really good at first.  I’m officially renaming Timber Lunges the “Bus to Abiliene”, a fitting reference to a well known and oft-taught cautionary tale of the dangers of groupthink.  #whatwasithinking

It’s a chromosome thing ….
[Buck:  ‘So NOLA, you ran 8 miles earlier this morning huh?  Are you training for something’?]
[NOLA: ‘Nope’]
[Buck:  ‘So you just felt like running 8 and then coming here for another hour of THIS’]
[NOLA: ‘Pretty much’]
Two very important take-aways here.  #1:  Buck, never EVER ask a woman to explain herself.  #2  NOLA, we have no dress code here.  You don’t have to leave the red cape and bedazzled thigh high boots in the car.  We all know you’re BA; it’s cool.   

T-Claps
Buckeroo:  for braving the cold & dark to plant the Shovel flag this a.m. and putting in a great effort.  Hang in there on the Timbers.  They’re tough but I like your ‘Never Quit’ attitude.  Hoorah!

Smoke & Stick:  Back after a week MIA and looking strong.  While on the road last week, Smoke introduced the Treadmill gang at the Courtyard to his version of Ring o’ Fire.  They were not amused.  I love it.  Just like I told you – you can do this workout ANYWHERE.   Consistency mah brutha’, consistency!

Michigan:  Sour gut & all … way to hang.  Just say no to crop dusting.   

Mid week training.  Morning runs (6:00 a.m.) on Tues & Thurs leaving from Summergrove Golf Club; distance varies (4-7 miles).  Show up or contact me or KX if you want to run.

Be sure to invite a friend for next week.  May our group grow in numbers and in strength.    

J-Delta

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