GONADS--Spartan Race-BackBlast-6.25.11

GONADS/Spartan Race/Carolinas-6.25.11

Spartans:

OBT
SixMike
Girardi
Antonio Table

Johnny Most
Rock
Rook

Dredd
RedWarrior
TangoDelta

Shack aka Eutaw
Zoot
BlackBird

Silence

The Thang:

Run...8 miles of badass cross-country single tracks, ravines, creeks, ponds, mud pits, and hills...a lot of hills.

Obstacles...in no particular order...failure of any required 30 burpees.

- fire jump

- waist deep water pit crossing under floating barrels

- 6 ft wall jumps and 'through the hole' tire wall jumps

- cinder blocks on rope pulleys

- monkey bar swings

- 20 ft cargo net tent climb

- lilly pad hopping (crossing a field of telephone poles, of varying height and spacing, implanted into the ground by jumping from one to another without touching the ground)

- 50 yd swim

- 50 yd travertine rope water crossing (single rope suspended between two trees on opposite sides of the pond - hang underneath by hands and ankle hooks)

- tire run (you guessed it...pickup a tire and run hills while carrying the tire)

- sand bag run (ditto)

- 15 ft cliff dive (just like you see in Acapulco...without actual diving, blue water, speedos, etc.)

- soul suckers (think crawling up and down numerous steep, red clay, motocross jumps back to back with slick mud pits at the bottom of each...brutal)

- 50 yd barbed wire crawl

- javelin throw

- greased tent (12 ft high greased plywood lean-to with ropes)

- mud hole rope climb (10 ft vertical climb out of mud/water hole using a rope)

Naked Moleskine:

- Team - Your fellow men rocked this course. It was tough and awesome. We all pushed and pulled each other through. Each of you should join us next time. It is a legitimate challenge that may prove to be your personal catalyst.

- Trouble in Paradise - OBT and Dredd go into the woods pre-race...OBT comes back alone. When Dredd finally reappears, it looks as if he was attacked by the same pygmy mountain lion that went after Moniteur last month. We later found out that OBT planted him facedown in the poison ivy after Dredd mocked his parents' late 1960s/early1970s passion for show dogs one time too many.

- Banana Hammock - Johnny Most doing a flip off the high dive. (Didn't see it, sure wish I had. *OBT)

- The Return of Zoot - Undertrained? Perhaps. Injured? Probably. Always welcome in any GONADS bus/van? Absolutely. (*OBT)
- GONADS - The guy who, when passed by another team shirt with GONADS on the back, said, "God, how many GONADS are there in this race?" (*OBT)
- Fillies - Gentlemen...the field was impressive. Reeeeaaally impressive. It seems that each team had numerous opportunities to lock in the 'ol tractor beams on spandex pace cars before, during and after the race. Although all in the crew are likely guilty, SixMike and I have borne the brunt of the accusations from our fellow teammates while on the course. I did not have the pleasure of racing with SixMike, however know that one or two of those pace cars pulled me through some particularly trying times. RedWarrior also deserves some credit for waiting at the top of the cliff dive no less than 3 mins to ensure that the green topped lady was safe...as it turns out she was afraid of heights and ended up doing some sort of back flip triple lindy maneuver into the pit instead of just jumping.
- Man down - Aside from OBT's pre-race attack on Dredd, there were numerous tales of men down along the trail...booby trap ankle vines, head gouging branches, toe breaking stumps, etc. SixMike claimed the 'Two Left Feet Award' for reportedly going to ground 4x.

- The battle rages on - Each of you should pick a side in the Phish vs. Widespread Panic vs. Grateful Dead competition and then go to Johnny Most with your opinion. There is no wrong answer.

- All hail the Minister of Transportation - 3x claps to Table for a dogged, determined effort -- if last month's SF Bay to Breakers race (at 7+ miles) was at the time the longest race he had ever completed in his life, then I would assume the Spartan is now the lifetime long -- and let me assure you, the Bay to Breakers is no Spartan ... (OBT submitted images from the B2B race in SF. Be thankful that I spared you the visual scars.)

- Aint no I in TEAM - SixMike, OBT, Giardi and Antonio Table all hit the final obstacle wall before the finish at the same time. It would have made one heck of a picture. That sort of teamwork is why we do this crazy stuff. Nice job, gentlemen.

- Tavern - Post-race pints and fellowship (and wings) at Ed's.

- Evidence - I have some photos for distribution and am working on the best way to post.