Aye, we planted the ShovelFlag in the humid Gloom, and the Faithful gathered:
SixMike
PBo (Kotter)
Fargo (Kotter)
Kit
Rook
Neo
TangoDelta
Cougar
Wichita (Kotter)
Achtung Baby (WarDaddy)
MightyWind (FNG)
Frankie Five Angels
SuperDave
McDeuce
BlackSperm
Hitman
BlackBird
MMOB
Haywood
Senor Chips
Silence of the Silence
Dredd
Mizer
Commodore Griswold
McNugget
DST
IronMike (WarBaby)
The Thang:
Run to Trophy Court
-Side Straddle Hops (lost count, lots of them)
Run to Flag Court
-Dirty Nasty McDeuce (It burned)
Run to Brickyard
-Hey Johns (3X—still no response)
-Stinkorama
Run to Harper Valley
-Six Minutes of Mary (it’s supposed to burn)
Robert Plants (4X)
Run to Ramos’ Office
-The People’s Chair (aye, Young Lust)
NakedMan Moleskin:
1. War Daddy: Achtung Baby—51 and feeling fine.
2. War Baby: Iron Mike—29, you bastard. You killed Kenny.
3. Today’s Chuck: Chuck Norris did the Death Race with a 40 pound weight vest he borrowed from Ryno.
4. Kotters:
a. PBO: With ABO back in CNC, PBO is back on the Gamucci. Welcome Back.
b. Fargo: He’s been following Michelle Bachman around like a groupie, but now he’s back. Welcome Back.
c. Wichita: He was hanging around Chip Edens’ villa in Umbria for the last three weeks until Chip finally told him to get back to CNC or sabbatical somewhere else at least. Welcome Back.
5. FNG: Looking like Kenny Letts’ older brother, MightyWind blew in with MMOB and Cougar this AM. In the gloom, McNulty mistook his Taylor Hick-esque silvery mane for that of Sweeper Boy, and harshed him to get back in cadence—Cobains Brother, we don’t harsh on FNG’s until Day 2. TClaps and keep coming.
6. UA—Level 2: After hard committing to Haywood last night, Sweeper pulled an Irish Hello and no-showed him with a text message that it was “too wet to be safe out there”. C’mon Sweeper, they Paved Paradise, we did it in the parking lot. Don’t it always seem to go?
7. Epstien’s Mother:
a. THE WarDaddy is in Leeds buying an abandoned coal mine to add to BAML’s inventory of unsellable RealPro.
b. The Rock is in Buckhead helping set up for Freaknick.
c. OBT has the fam at the Motel Six in Delco waiting for clear skies so 2.0 can get in the pool.
d. Zoot has earned a day off after doing the Spartan Run on zero training. TClaps to MoonPie.
8. In Memory: All right Brothers. Independence Day is upon us again. It goes without saying that the men who signed the Declaration of Independence had full skin in the game. To tell the sovereign of the world that you opted out was to sign your own death warrant—and for many that was so. Without that selfless act of supreme commitment, we wouldn’t be sucking up weenies and Budweiser this weekend. We would be doing what the rest of the world does, laboring helplessly in tyranny. Even those misguided souls would not be free to burn the Flag that so much blood was shed to protect. Despite the turbulence of late and the equivocation of many, this remains a great nation and beacon of freedom for the rest of enslaved world. “There is no doubt—I love this land—God Bless the USA.”
Peace Brothers—travel safe and love on your families. See you on the backside.
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